It's not a sacrifice if it's what you want to do

Workout today: 1 mile with Lindsey in 4:38 (64, 75, 75, 63) then 600, 400, 300, 200, 100. 600 was 1:32, 400 in 58, 300 in 44, 200 in 30.

The workout today wasn't anything that difficult, but if anything it helped me realize that I've come a long way in four months. I've got a better sense of pace than I have ever had in the past. I've got a sense of confidence with my running that I don't think I've really had since high school.

I think a lot of times people look at runners and think about how much they sacrifice. Granted, trying to run fast requires a significant portion of your time to be dedicated to that one thing in your life. It also means that sometimes you have to be selfish and sometimes you can't just do the easy thing. It generally means that you do a lot of work for what seems like very little tangible reward. But, I would argue that running isn't a sacrifice at all. Sure it sucks that sometimes you're not going to be able to go on that trip to Vegas five days before you race. But that's a choice you're making, because you realize that ultimately you only have so many races and so many chances to see the results of the work that you've put into running.

I'm 23 years old right now. I've got such a minuscule chance of ever making it big in running that a bookie wouldn't even take a bet on it. At the same time, if I'm ever going to do anything with running, now is the time. I'd rather not look back at this point in my life and say why the hell did I not try to do everything I could to see what would happen? I've got one of the best coaches in the world trying to help me, I've got a job that will be more understanding than most in terms of running and I've got a group of guys to train with. So, while I'm not going to be showing up on Wall Street anytime soon, at least at the end of this I'll know. I'll know that I wasn't scared to give it a shot.

Say whatever you want because I can laugh it off...

I don't know how to start this post...so I'm going to ramble for a little bit and just go with it.

Things that are going on right now:

1. One of my mom's best friends from when I was a kid just had surgery for cancer and is going into chemotherapy in the next couple weeks. I haven't seen her in four years. Yet, you know what she asked of my mom? She asked if she could have a picture of what my brother and I look like now. I've known Myra since I was literally one year old and its sort of sad that I haven't seen her in such a long time. Its funny too, my brother and I spent a lot of time with her but the two biggest things I can remember about those times we spent together are peanut butter cookies and stamps. As a kid I loved peanut butter but for some reason the idea of peanut butter cookies sounded awful to me. I mean how can you say that peanut butter is going to beat chocolate in a cookie? But Myra always managed to make the best peanut butter cookies. The ones she made are probably the only ones I've ever liked. The stamp thing had to do with Myra making any card she ever sent from scratch using a bunch of different stamping techniques. My brother and I went through a stage where we loved to collect random different rubber stamps to make up these crazy cards and pictures. We did it because it was just fun and we probably got taught some pretty cool stuff by Myra. But when I look back on things like that I realize how lucky I was to have people in my life who supported me being creative, even if it wasn't very good stuff. My parents were always supportive of that, but having people besides your parents supporting you being creative just adds to your ability to push your imagination. I don't think everyone gets that growing up. Having that basis in being creative doesn't just restrict it to being artistic, but also not being afraid to look at things from different angles. Anyway, I hope that I can someday thank Myra for that, and that she has the quickest recovery possible.

2. Chris Sr. (Chris' Father) had a kidney transplant last week. He and the entire family had been waiting for this for a long time, so it was great to hear he was finally getting it. He's struggled through dialysis and its good to know that he's not going to have to go through that anymore. Times like that make you realize how close everyone at Pacers is, they were relying on the rest of us who couldn't be up there with Chris Sr. to take care of their family business. I know Wade and I definitely took that very seriously, we just care about the store. We show it in different ways for sure, I mean he's completely taken ownership of that store. It is his and he's going to do everything he can to make it better. I don't think the things I do are as visible (and I'm perfectly fine with that), work is never going to be a thing that is all about me and what I did. If I did something that helped something work more efficiently or created a situation for the business to improve then that's good enough.

3. The frickin' hip. More of an annoyance than anything, its still tight but I think I'm going to be good to do some workouts on it and keep my fitness up. Its actually felt a lot better the last couple days. But all I can think about is racing. I want to race. I want to look back at running 3:55 and say that was a start but I've come a long way. BUT...as I keep saying, that doesn't happen overnight. If running was easy, or if all you had to do was make sure you ran everyday and showed up to practice then there would be tons of people doing it. Running isn't easy. It's never going to be. I'm usually not a big one for quotes (unless they're coming from song lyrics but that's just because I listen to way too much music) but there has been one that has stuck with me in regards to the mile. The guy who said it probably had no intention of having it apply to running but I think it sticks pretty well. "Effort is only effort when it begins to hurt"
I don't think it just applies to the physical pain of running either. You've got to want to run, (not saying you're not going to wake up most mornings and say "I'm definitely the luckiest person in the world to be going for a run right now, forget the fact that I haven't had a day off in however many months and my body is saying eff you right now). There just has to be a part of you that thinks you can do better, that you can still put more effort in than you already have. Otherwise, whats the point? If you just barely go sub 4 in the mile, do you sit back and say "Look at me, I ran 3:59"..no, no way. You probably show up to practice the next day and try to figure out what the plan is going to be to run 3:57.

I know this post has been all over the place, but I think what I'm getting at is; there are millions of things in life that are going to trip you up. Plenty more that are going to knock you on your ass and then continue to step on you. But every time you think you have it the worst, I guarantee there is someone else in the world that is having a rougher time than you. Life, like running, is never going to be easy. At some point hopefully you get to create a situation where finances aren't a major worry, but there's always something else. I mean even when you become financially sound you still have kids and family to take care of and worry about. The point is, sometimes you have to look around outside your own little cares and worries and realize that maybe you don't have it so bad. Maybe you're putting in a little bit of effort each day that might get you somewhere someday. Maybe you're luckier than you think.

Alright, alright, slow down...

Went up to Philly to race an 800 yesterday. Didn't go exactly to plan...ran 1:57 which is better than I've done in the past but I know I'm faster than that right now. Race went out slow, about 58-59, so I decided to make a move with 300 to go. I think in retrospect I could've waited another 50m before making the move but at the time I wanted to be aggressive.

Continuing with the hindsight aspect I probably shouldn't have even raced on Monday. It didn't really have to do with the race on Thursday, I felt recovered from that on Saturday. It was more having to work both days of the weekend, plus working the Pacers Running Festival on Sunday before working the store just wiped me out. Then on the drive up my hip started to bug me and felt a little tight before the race. I decided to shrug it off and figured it would warm up as the race went on. Well when I went for that move at 300, it felt a like it tweaked a bit, then when I went to go a little harder the last 100 it really messed it up. I basically limped around the rest of the time up in Philly. The 3 hour drive back didn't help it any, had a rough night of sleep. Was still limping this morning, luckily, Julie (who I probably should have listened to in the first place and just not raced) got me in to see Dr. Beck.

My hip probably popped about 15 different ways while I was there. It definitely felt better after he was done but it's something I'm going to have to be very diligent about. I took today off just to rest it. I'll take it fairly easy this week and just make sure I'm 100% for my next race.

3:55 was a big step, and I think I let it affect my decision making on this race. I should have been comfortable enough knowing I'm in good shape now and that if my body is telling me its tired, beat up and hurting, then I shouldn't be lining up to race. I also need to make sure I'm setting myself up to do well by doing more of the little things to improve my running. Getting more rest, creating less stressful situations for myself, and being a little more selfish. Selfish doesn't mean being an ass to people, but more aware that if I'm racing, I can't be doing a million different things for people the day before the race.

Thanks to Heather for letting me borrow her car to get up there, and to Wade for setting the work schedule up so that I could go up for the race. Next time I travel for a meet I'm definitely coming home with a better result than this one.

It's a start

I know taking a week in between blogs must have been really hard for everyone (all 2 people). But no worries, I'll make up for it in this post.

Part of the reason I didn't post right after last Saturday's race (the Pacers Mile in the middle of the Draper Invitational) was, I had managed to PR in the mile by 10 seconds but I felt like I didn't lay it out there. I was in shape to run faster and it just didn't happen and I think it was more mental than physical. After being pretty terrible for four years at GW, it became more of a mental barrier to have the confidence to run fast rather than being in the physical shape to do so. I think more people were impressed with that mile than I was, I knew I could break 4:20, I just didn't take any chances which was the bigger problem.

Five days later I planned on running the 1500m at the Maryland Twilight meet. In the past I definitely would have freaked, knowing I had done a lot of hard work in the last 2 weeks without any taper. But the one thing that I've started to notice working with Coach is; even when my legs feel like absolute shit before a workout, or even between intervals, I can still run hard. All Coach had my do on Tuesday was 8 by 200 all around 30 (a few were 28-29). So I felt fairly sharp for Thursday's race.

However, the morning of the race, while I was on my shakeout I felt like my hip was really out of place. All the time I was at work it just felt wrong and my back started to bother me. Julie finally convinced me to try to get Dr. Beck to see me(I guess every now and then its a good idea to listen to her). I honestly thought he wouldn't be able to squeeze me in, but luckily he saw me and popped everything back into place. Drove up with Lindsey (big thank you to her for constantly putting up with driving me to practice and this meet). Drive up was a little hectic but it all worked out and we got up there with plenty of time for Lindsey to relax and then warm up before her race. It was just an 800m race to bust some of the rust off her legs, and she definitely did that. She sat back in the pack until about 500m to go and then started moving up. With 250m to go she blasted by everyone and then lead it all the way to the tape. She looked really smooth and ran even splits for a 2:07. It was really cool to see her race even though it wasn't a big one for her or anything.

I knew one of the other guys in my race, Ryan Murphy, he runs for George Mason now and he also works part time in Pacers Fairfax. Ryan is a real chill guy but also a very good runner. Four months ago there is no way I would have been able to hang with him or probably even be seeded in the same heat. But this time we were in the same heat and he told me that he was going to have some guys rabbit him through to try and go sub 3:50. I got a little nervous at this point but it was a little different from how I've felt in the past couple years before a race. It wasn't so much "Holy $H!T, I'm going to get burned", more just a feeling of excitement. Anyway, I go on the warm up, don't feel great but that's nothing new at this point. While I'm doing strides my hip still feels tight but I put it out of my mind and just think that its going to loosen up as the race goes on. We line up and the starter lets us know that we're going to have two rabbits, one will go through 800 at 2:01 and the 2nd will try to get through 1200 at 3:03. I get out the first 100m but settle in somewhere mid pack through the first 400m. I move up a couple spots going into 800m and probably come through around 2:05. I'm in about 5th or 6th coming into 1200m, with 300m to go I start trying to move on people. I close the gap on the guy in third (one of the guys I train with incidentally) and with a 100m to go I almost doubt I can catch him. Somehow I find a way to surge and come third. I ended up running 3:55.11. It was a good 10 second PR, and definitely something that had to happen. So while I'm psyched to break 4 minutes, I've still got a lot of work to do. I've got to work even harder now, because I've got at least another 10 seconds to drop.

I didn't call Coach after the race because I didn't think it was a big deal. I think he knew I could do that and he might even think I can go a good bit faster than that. He called me tonight and gave out to me a little bit for not calling. The big things he pointed out to me was I need to start doing everything I can to make my life less stressful. The cool thing is it seems like he thinks I could be a 3:45 guy, but I know that's going to take a ton of work. Until I do it, it's nothing. But I'm going to do everything I can to run that fast.

*sidenote...it felt really cool to have people there that I knew, it had been a longtime since I'd raced in front of people who weren't just my teammates.

There's more to life than running

While a good majority of this blog tends to deal with running, I'm the first to recognize that there is life outside of running (or at least not entirely related to running). The other purpose of this blog was to track the exploits of that infamous Chris Farley character.

Well this past weekend at the GW Parkway Classic, Chris took a big step...He asked Kathy to marry him in front of everyone at the race. I couldn't be happier for the two of them and I only hope I get the invite to the wedding haha.

blazinnnnnn...

Evidently the recent weather in the DC metro area has decided to give us a preview of what working out in the middle of July is going to be like. On Saturday a few us did a 1200 time trial at the AU track. It was definitely in the 80's during the workout which is considerably warmer than it has been. The plan was to hit 3:07-3:09 (basically 62.5 for the quarters). We came through the first 400 at 60, Slicko then took the lead to try and calm it down but relaxed a little too much and we hit 66 (still through the 800 in 2:06 so not too bad), we closed in 59 high for a 3:06. Felt pretty smooth the whole way even though the pace was a little erratic. We did 6 by 200 in 30 afterwards and called it a day.

Slicko and I came back Sunday to make sure Pacers got represented in the GW Parkway 5k. Weather was in the upper 80's. I actually felt pretty decent considered we had time trialed the day before and I had only got 3 hours of sleep that night (thanks Jimmy). I planned on treating it like a cut down because I didn't expect much competition. Slicko and I sat on some guys for the first 400-800m (hard to tell in a road race), and then I decided to break from the pack because we were crawlllling. First mile in 5:25, 2nd in 5:13, last one was sub 5, Slicko put a little push in there and came across the line first. Ran quite a bit afterwards and then worked the store for the rest of the day.

Today (Tuesday), showed up to the track and it was about 90 degrees. Didn't know what I was going to do (shocker I know) but heard from the AU guys that the plan was 2 by 400 followed by 4 by 200. I figured we would be doing something like that because the AU guys have conference this weekend. Coach must have been in a good mood today because he looked at the guys I was working out with and said, "Mark, this looks like a good group for you to be leading the whole thing." So, we set off and hit 62.5 for the first and 63.5 for the second. Everyone else goes off to do 200's but Coach just tells me to keep doing 400's. At this point I know better than to ask how many. I then proceed to pick it up a little bit and hit 60 point and then 59 point. After five of them coach asks me what I'm hitting and tells me to slow down. I hit the next one in 64, a little too slow. I finally hit the last one in 62 right on pace. I then do 3 laps jog and come back for 200's. I hit the first one a little fast in 28. I calm down and hit the following 4 in anywhere from 30.3 to 29.2. After five Coach asks me if they feel easy. This is sort of dangerous ground because you never really know what you should say, I ended up saying I felt comfortable. Coach then says that he wants to see me do a 300 at the same sort of pace. I take off into the wind a little bit and just try to stay smooth. Come through the line at 42.5. Coach seemed really happy with the workout.

Three good efforts in four days. I'm definitely getting better but it was funny today, I never got that excited that I was doing well. I could have some of the greatest workouts ever, but until I do something in a race it doesn't really mean all that much. The good thing that the workouts are giving me is some confidence to get out there and race all out. I swear I've been on a roller coaster this last month, one minute I'm up and the next I'm freakin' out or bummed about something. The one thing I'm trying to keep constant is my training. I figure if I can at least control that then I have a shot at figuring everything else out.

The song below is what was going through my head during the workout....

C Farley runs 4:51...next stop sub 4:30

The end of week time trials kicked off today (4/23) with the infamous Chris Farley going after the sub 5 minute mile. Chris is planning on going after the sub 4:30 mile in August so today was going to be used as a bench mark to determine how far off he was at this point. At this point in his training Chris hasn't done any speed work at all and has been running a ridiculous amount of "junk" mileage (check out Chris' Blog Running My Life for the definition of junk miles).

Chris enlisted me to pace him through a 5 minute mile. I decided that in order for this to really go down we needed to turn it into a little bit more of an event than just Chris going around the track four times in under 5 minutes. So, I told Slicko aka Scott Anderson (Pacers Racing team guy, man has gone under 3:40 for the 1500) about the attempt. He was all for it and decided to help out with the pacing duties as well.

Of course, I couldn't just leave it at that, we had to get some more people involved. Seeing as this whole sub 4:30 mile thing started with the idea of Chris training with Julie (Culley), she had to be there. She showed up, camera and all, just to get some great pics with even better captions (such as the Pacers...got to love double entendre) . The fun didn't stop there though, we did the time trial at Chris' old high school and who should be there but his high school coach. To round it out we had his big bro Brian "Billy" Farley, out there as the official timer.

Slicko and I decided to trade off leads, I would take the 1st and 3rd quarters and Slicko would get the 2nd and 4th, leading Chris out to kick it in. Slicko and I had just done a workout an hour or two before so we were already pretty loose. I take the first 200m's through in 35 secs, a little fast but nothing that is going to kill the attempt. We come through the 400m at 73-74, Slicko takes the lead and we come through 800m at 2:28-2:29. With a big negative split in the second half Chris comes through at 4:51. Not bad for a guy who was talking like he wasn't going to break 5:10.

It was great seeing Chris get that excited about the run. Today was one of those days were I felt kind of lucky to be a part of Pacers. I mean I get to train with some great guys, and an awesome Coach. And I get to work with some pretty cool people too. Its not always the "easy" life but its definitely a lot better than hating every single day of work. Anyway, congrats to Chris and I guess we'll see that sub 4:30 mile at the Supernova Classic in August.

The Pros and Cons of Breathing...

Saturday I went up to Morgan State to run my first 1500 in over a year. I'd been feeling like crap the whole week mostly due to the lack of sleep I'd been getting. I let myself have way too many things on my mind that week and wasn't focusing on the small things (like getting enough sleep) to be really ready for the race. The workout on Tuesday went ok, but I felt like shit from the start. Thursday was fine but it was just 200's so if it had gone badly I would have had ample reason to be concerned about how Saturday would go.

Anyway, I go up to AU the morning of the race to take one of the guys on the team up there with me. I figure its the least I can do to help out whenever I can with the team. Ride up with Ryan was fine, didn't get lost which was the major concern seeing as the school is in some random part of Baltimore. We beat the team up there so we just check in and hang out for a little while. I get to see the heat sheets when we arrive and I'm in the first of two heats. The fact that me and only two of the AU kids are in that heat lets me know I just missed the cut off for the "fast" heat. I only have myself to be pissed with though because I chose to seed myself at 3:58, I should have seeded myself at 3:55 to make sure I was in the fast heat. While looking over the heat sheets I also notice that there are two heats of the Women's 1500 which is the event before mine so I factor that into my warm up.

All of us running the 1500 go for the warm up together, but by the time we come back we're seeing the end of the Women's 1500, which normally would be fine but they had combined both heats into one. This meant that they intended to start the Men's 1500 20 minutes ahead of schedule. Luckily, Bridget convinced them to wait (she had significant pull too seeing as the majority of the runners there for the 1500 were AU kids). As we line up for the first heat I realize that the one guy who was seeded ahead of me has scratched from the race. So I'm lined up on the inside, as the gun goes off I make sure to get out a little bit so I'm not trapped in the back but I expect one of the other guys in the heat to take the lead. To my surprise I'm in the lead from the gun without much work at all. As I come through 300m I have a bad flashback to a race my sophmore year at Duke where I took out the first two laps of a 5k because I thought I was that much better than everyone in my heat...I ended up dying horribly. I come through the 400 at 64 feeling really smooth though. I don't look back but at 600m's in I can tell I'm entirely alone (later all the AU guys told me I had a 20 to 30m lead on the rest of the field from the 400m mark on). I tried to turn it into a time trial, but for some reason it was hard as hell to breath, I had cotton mouth the whole way. Legs felt fine but breathing was horrible, I managed to run 4:05 by myself. It wasn't a great race and I know I let sub 4 get away from me. The things I took away from the race were, I always have to be prepared to lead from the gun, I need to work on staying mentally sharp when I do run on my own, and 4:05 (a 3 sec PR) felt comfortable.

Tomorrow its back to work; over the next few weeks I'm going to try and race a lot (probably even throwing a road race in there....GW PARKWAY), hopefully its all going to pay off.

progress....

Today's workout: 8 by 200 at 31 with flats, then mile jog, then 800m time trial.

Coach called me right when I got up to AU, said I was going to do 4-6 200's with the guys and then do a 800 at race pace. Went on my warm up, felt ok but not great. Got in with a good group of the milers and we went through the motions of 31 second 200's. The nice thing was they felt really easy never had to push to make sure we were hitting the pace.

Jason and I were the only ones who did 8 of them, then coach had me do a mile run, put my spikes on and do a 800. He held one of the guys back to lead my through 400m and told me to follow him no matter what he did. Well, after doing the 200's I knew what 31 felt like so to be working harder than that in the first 150m meant we were well under 30 seconds for the first 200. The kid calmed down though and we came through the 400 at 62.5. Coach had wanted me to come through at about 64-65, but he just calmly told me to maintain this through the second 400. I ended up pulling a little negative split and running 2:03 for 800. Good thing was it never felt like I had to hammer to do it, I definitely pushed at 50m's to go but wasn't in my last gear at all. Coach seemed pretty pleased, and said I should race next weekend up at Morgan State. I'll have to figure out how I'm getting up there but I feel really good about the idea of racing.

not racing

After the Tuesday workout (3 sets of 800, 300: 2:20-2:12 for the 8's, 47-45 for the 3's, then mile run, then 6,4,3,2,1..62 through 400 of the 6, 59 for the 4, 42 for the 3, and 28 for the 2) I talked to Coach about racing the 1500 at Bucknell the following weekend. At the time Coach seemed to think it was a good idea. However, after the workout on Thursday (6 by 300 at 46-45...one was at 43) Coach reconsidered and told me to hold off on racing.

It hadn't been a great week already due to some other stuff going on, so when I heard this it took me a little while not to see the negative in Coach's decision. At first, I started thinking that I'd been having good workouts, I'm really itching to race why the hell is Coach telling me NOT to race? Does he think I'm not tough enough or really in good shape? Should I doubt how I feel fitness-wise? And then I thought about it a little more. Sure I've come a long way from my fitness in January when finishing 8 400's at 70 pace was a struggggle. But, if I've done that in 3 months, how much further along can I get with another month's worth of training? I shouldn't be in a rush just to race for the sake of racing. I should be getting as fit and as mentally ready to race as I possibly can, so that when I do come to the line I'm really ready to go. I'm not in a situation where I have to race myself into shape. There is a certain amount of maturity, or belief in a philosophy, that you have to bring to your running when working with Coach. Especially as a post-collegiate, Coach isn't going to be checking up on you all the time. But I have to believe that if I do what I need to do, and follow what Coach says, he'll hold up his end of the deal.

That isn't to say that if I follow exactly what Coach tells me to do that all of sudden I'm going to be a sub 4 minute miler or anything of that sort. However, I got enough faith in the training, and Coach, that my chances of doing something better than I've ever done is possible. Maybe that's what I missed up till now, just a little bit of faith.

On a side note, It was a solid Irish/Pacers one, two at the first of 5 Crystal City 5k's. Wade rocked out, taking home the win in 15:44 in considerably windy conditions. Second was Edmund Burke in 16:02; guess those track workouts with Coach have been paying off. Make sure to check out the rest of these 5k's .

600m..and then the biggest let down 200m

So I went up to the University of Maryland to race the 800 this weekend. Big thanks to Chris and Kathy for letting me borrow the car so I could get up there.

This was the first time I've raced unattached at a college meet, and it was definitely weird. I didn't have anyone there with me, I warmed up on my own, didn't hear anything from a coach before the race and didn't have any teammates or friends there to yell at me during the race.

Anyway, felt kinda nervous for the first time all week during the warm up. I got sort of worried that I was going to disappoint coach unless I did really well. Felt alright during the warm up, couldn't time the length that well because the meet was running 30-45 minutes ahead of schedule which is virtually unheard of, generally they are running behind. I was seeded in the 2nd of 3 heats, watched the 1st heat and it was definitely slow, guys were running 2:15. My heat gets called and of the 16 guys who are supposed to be in it only about 10-12 of them line up. We line up and the gun goes off. Of course with my luck the guy next to me goes down in the first 5 meters and we get called back to the line. I take a stride, then come back to the line. This time we get away cleanly. I start off in 7th or 8th but by 200m I'm sitting in 4th and it felt effortless. I just cruised up on people's shoulders and moved up, by the 400m we were at 56-57 and I was sitting in 3rd. Still felt really smooth at this point and was just waiting to get to the 600m mark to kick. We hit the 600m mark in 1:26-27, and I'm getting excited to go, I'm still in it at the bend but then all of a sudden we hit the last 100m and I start rigging....and I mean bad. Everything locked up, I just couldn't get anything going with my legs. I end up finishing 5th or 6th.

I was soooooo pissed afterwards. I just don't know what happened on that bend. I had set the race up perfectly, giving myself the best opportunity to win the heat. And instead of killing the last 200m, I ran like I had been shot in both quads by a sniper. Sure I pr'd which is cool I guess, but the thing that gets me about it is, I knew I could win this race. And I didn't. I let it go, I couldn't get myself to get across that line quite fast enough.

But Tuesday its back to work and I'm hoping this 800 has busted the rust off my racing legs. I'm going to make it a different story at Bucknell in a couple weeks. And until then I'm going to be shutting up about what I'm going to do, until I do it.

outside of running...

Not to get too runner geek here but to quote the Prefontaine movie, Without Limits, "many consider running to be an absurd pasttime." And honestly, the masses may be entirely right. I mean if you think about it, only a very tiny percentage of the people who have been running since high school end up running in college. Then from there you've got an even smaller amount who decide to run post collegiately. And then you take into account that out of this minuscule pool of people that decide to train seriously after college, there are only going to be a handful of people who ever get sponsored and become professional runners.

So the question that obviously has to be asked is...why the hell am I still running?

As a runner I've never done anything close to exceptional. I was a slightly better than average high school runner, and a less than stellar college athlete. And while I'm definitely in better shape than I ever was (save maybe the first month of my senior year in cross country) in college, and being coached by arguably one of the best coaches in the country/world, what am I going to amount to in terms of running? You don't just magically overnight become a great runner. And as much as running is about the effort you put in, at a certain point it comes down to what you were born with. I guess I just haven't ever found out exactly where that limit is.

Maybe I'm living in a pipe dream scenario, but I keep thinking I've got a lot more in me then I've ever put down in a result in a race. Do I think I'm capable of going under 3:50 in the 1500? Definitely. But I've never done it, and thats another part of running. Until you've done it, its just a thought, a question left out there thats still waiting to be answered.

There's another reason I'm lucky to be running right now. Its the only thing thats keeping me fairly sane. I know that every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, I'll be given a chance to put myself through something that a lot of people wouldn't ever dream of doing. And no matter how screwed up I might be feeling or how many things might not have gone my way, for those few hours it doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter. All that matters is that I step on the track and come across the line of every single interval.

First race is next weekend, an 800 at the University of Maryland. I kind of wanted a few people to be there but for a variety of reasons, they can't make it. This is a complete 180 from high school when I would have paid people not to come watch (this was a time in my life where winning or at least coming in the the top 3 in a race wasn't a ridiculous notion at all, weird how kids can be in high school right?) . I guess part of it is I miss people coming to watch me just for the sake of being there and the other part is maybe deep down I'm a bit of a show off ha. Ah well its the first one, its a rust buster, its just to get the feel of being on the track racing again. But I'd be kidding myself if I didn't want to blow the doors of some people.

8:45pm workout, not as much fun as it sounds

Today was supposed to be a relatively simple Tuesday in terms of workouts. Woke up in the morning did a four mile cutdown, starting at 6 minute pace and ending around 5:15 pace. Then go to work until 8:15pm or so and do 12 by 200m with 200 jog afterwards.

Of course, nothing is quite as simple as it seems. 12 by 200 doesn't sound like that much, but when its your second workout of the day after being on your feet all day it does add a certain degree of difficulty to the equation. Add in that you didn't get off work until roughly 8:30pm (yes, its only 15 minutes but it makes a BIG difference), and all of sudden you've got yourself a workout that seems like its going uphill both ways.

Anyway, after getting my warm up in I proceed to go through with the idea of running 30 second 200's with a 200m jog inbetween. Inbetween the 6th and 7th 200m I would take a 400m jog and then begin the second set. I start off and I'm literally the only one on the track. Cross the line in 30 seconds flat feeling like I just closed out a 10 mile race. An auspicious start to a workout if ever I've had one. I somehow make it through the remaining 5 of them all just under 30 at 29.5. I take the 400m jog which just basically feels like a slow 200m jog its over before I know it. For the second set I proceed to tell myself that each one is going to be my last one if I don't make it across the line in 30 or below. Well I made it through all of them at 29 mid to low and then take the short cool down back to the house.

Couple weeks ago probably would have bagged it, but ever since Coach asked me "How good do you want to be son" (asked is maybe a mild understatement), I've been thinking a lot about it. And what it comes down to is I want to stop thinking and talking about how cool it would be to go some of the big meets. I want to actually go to them and compete. Well not only compete, but get in there and surprise some people.

After finishing undergrad everything hasn't gone to plan for me; in reality I didn't picture myself being where I am doing what I'm doing at all. First couple months I bummed out about it. Now I'm starting to see the opportunities its giving me. I've got my whole life to make big plans and do big things in the 'adult' world. Which I'm definitely going to do, not a doubt in my mind. But, how often am I going to get a chance to be coached by a guy who has forgotten more about running then I'll ever know, and get to work with people who are not only like family but are so passionate about what they do? I guess what it's teaching me is there is always something to be gained from experiences, no matter if they're ones you planned on or not.

SIDENOTE: Get excited for the flying Irishman (Wade) to be updating everyone on his triathalon training!

I swear, I'll try to be better about this...

I know my seriously devoted readers have just been distraught by my lack of blogging in the last couple weeks but I've been wrapped up in other stuff. Between running and work, the time I have to myself is usually spent recovering. I'm managing to make it work though.

The last couple weeks I've started to feel just that little bit more confident with my running. For instance, this last Saturday I had a workout up at AU that a couple months ago I would have had a real tough time getting through. It was supposed to be a 2 mile in 10:10 then 3 mile light tempo and then back to the track for 200's. 2 mile was done in 10:03 and definitely could have either closed faster than that or could have kept going for another mile no problem. 200's were done starting at 31 and going down to 29. In all it was at least 11 miles worth of work. My only downfall in the workout was not doing "enough" 200's. Coach hadn't said how many 200's to do so I did 6 because that is what we had normally been doing at the end of workouts. Evidently Coach thought I should have done 8. He had his own way of pointing it out, but the important thing is he was wanting me to think about my training. Its a different approach from how I have been coached in the past but if you think about it, it really makes sense. If you can't do 8 200's with rest, how are you going to run 8 straight with no rest? Its just another way Coach makes you better, he wants you thinking rather than just telling you how to do it.

He's off this week and he didn't give me any workouts for the week so I'm going to just do ones we have done in the past. Tomorrow is going to be 4 by 800 starting at 2:20 and then a 3 mile run, followed by 6 by 300. It was a sort of tough workout last time so I'm hoping with the improved fitness that I'll feel a little bit more controlled this time. Might even try and call Coach and let him know how it went...

long time coming

Still running and due to this and nature of work in the last week I've been slacking pretty heavily on my blogging duties (but then so has Mr. Farley...hhhmmm).

Anyway, I've been having solid workouts with the AU guys, got through 8 by 400 at 68 or faster with 200m rest and then 4 by 200's with no problems this week. Thats a big step up from a couple weeks ago when I died in a 400 workout with the quarters at 70.

Work has beeeeeeeeeeeeen hectic all week. Having Wade not around makes you realize how much he really does. It also shows how I'm way more focused on the computer stuff than I am on the floor stuff right now. I think its why Wade and I work pretty well together. He's good at looking at the stuff that I don't particularly want to take care of, and I do the stuff that he would rather not to do. Anyway, lets hope this running thing keeps going well.

recccaaaappppp

So I "raced" on Sunday. I put it in quotes because I never felt like I was racing. Its been awhile since I raced and it just turned into a workout type scenario for me. I just ended up staying comfortable the whole way, never felt like I was pushing it but at the same time couldn't get my legs to turn over. Ended up running 4:33 on the road, which isn't great but I did take a couple positives away from the race. First, I ran 4:33 off 4 weeks of medicore training. Second, I felt really relaxed running and am slowly creeping towards being in shape. Third, I finished in the top 3 in a race, and while the field wasn't packed with tons of elites, there were some very good guys in it and I managed to stay calm off the line.

Maybe I'm starting to do something right...

The majority of my day was spent putting future orders into the inventory system...as much fun as that sounds it did get monotonous at a certain point. I had decided not to run this morning and to get my run in this evening due to the late workout last night.

(Workout was at 8:30 last night and the plan was a fartlek starting with 4 minutes on then 3 then 2 then 1, it went alright. I ended up running about a 66 400m for the last interval and Lewis was there doing another workout so it could have been much worse)

ANYYYway, I just ran out the Custis trail and finished up my run at the W&L track. Coach was working with the Pacers Running Club. Now while these guys weren't "elite"; the group is designed to be a training group for people who are anywhere from looking to just make it through their first marathon, to people who have done a few but just want to get faster, it was great to see Coach putting as much thought into their workouts as he does into the Pacers Elite guys'. I ended up running around the track for a bit to keep warm (got about 8 miles on the day) and got a ride home with Coach and Kathy. The whole real purpose of showing up to the track was to ask Coach if he thought it would be ok if I hopped into this road mile this weekend. I don't think we were really planning on racing anytime soon and I know I'm not anywhere close to real racing shape. But I had a couple reasons for wanting to go out to this race.

1. I haven't been in a race in 4-5 months and I don't want it to be a complete shock when I do eventually start racing again.

2. I want to show the guys on the team and the guys at Pacers that I'm a team player, that I want to race for the team and that I'm all about supporting local races too ( the race is sponsored by Pacers)

3. I do happen to fall into the stereotypical "starving post-grad runner" and the fact that there happens to be a cash prize involved helps.

To my complete surprise I didn't really have to convince Coach about this idea...he just thought I should go do it, treat it like a hard training run and get a little bit of the feeling of a race experience back. I'm going to keep training through it (basically I'm doing a hill workout on Friday and not really backing off my distance on Saturday). I'll get my long run in after the mile and I'll have a pretty solid week. The one minor drawback is I'm not going to be able to go up to the XC nationals that are up in Maryland this weekend. The upside of this is Wade definitely will be able to go. I think its going to be good for him, give him a little boost in his last week before he can start running.

superbowl weekend

had two medicore runs over the weekend. Saturday was an easy 7 and Sunday was a pathetic 13. Sunday was just rough because we went out for one of my buddy's birthdays and I failed to have the motivation to go out and run really hard on Sunday. Hit 60 for the week though so starting to head in the right direction. Probably going to try and do that again this week and then we'll see what Coach has to say.

The Superbowl was definitely very entertaining this year, I was kind of pulling for the Cardinals just because they were the underdog. They gave the Steelers a run for their money in the fourth quarter which really kept it interesting.

Living the dream...this won't be the first time I use that title

So the majority of today was spent checking in Asics socks at the store. Now I don't have anything personally against Asics, a lot of people really like their shoes and they are a staple in any running store. But, their socks create a situation that tests the very limits of one's patient. Receiving them and stocking them is one of the biggest pains in the butt. Granted, Dwyer was kind enough to seperate them out between the stores, but the mind numbing process of checking each individually packaged pair into inventory was left to me.

The one good thing that came out of this was I was looking forward to the run tonight just to do something active. I started out nice and easy, and felt really good considering I had a workout the previous day. I did a little over 7 looping out towards the Capitol and back, picking it up on the way back. Got rehab tomorrow morning for the hip with Dr. Beck, so hopefully he'll keep working his magic and my lower abs will keep feeling better.

After I got back from my run I noticed I had a package waiting at the apartment. I was curious because I wasn't expecting any kind of package. I open it up and low and behold, its an Acumen Heart Rate monitor. Evidently in the podunk 5k (the race in which Chris became the Race Packet Series Champion and solidified his World Class Silly status) I had won my age group. Now while there are a lot of people out there who would absolutely thrilled to have won their age group, and rightly so, it was kind of a whatever moment for me. It wasn't because I don't like to win, but it was more because I didn't have to push myself to do it, and I wasn't pushed by anyone else to do it either. I guess thats why I keep running, I want to compete against people who might be "better" or faster than me. No one thought I would run in college after high school but I pulled that off and ended up running faster than the guy from my high school who went to UCLA. But I've still got a long way to go...just going to stick to Coach's plan and see where it takes me.

Icy Workout

Managed to pull off going up to AU to workout today...had no idea what I was going to be doing so that added to the fun. Anyway, got a ride up there with Dwyer and Sweet Lew. Met Slicko, Dumm, Baresi and surprise show up of the day, Frank. We started the warm up and were running with three of Coach's women including: Julie Culley and Lindsay Gallo. Both of them went to the US Olympic Trials this last year so they're sort of big deals. So we do our three mile warm up, toss some spikes on (due to the ice on one of the turns we ended up needing spikes and only could do 300 repeats).

Before the workout, Coach lines us up and then splits us into two groups. Dwyer, Frank, Slicko, and Lewis in one group, and then Barresi, Julie, Lindsay, and myself were in the second group. Back in the day I probably would've bitched about running with girls and had a huge ego about it. But I've totally bought into Coach at this point and whatever he does, he's doing it for a reason. Workout was 8 by 300 split into two sets of four with 100m recovery. The idea was to do one easy, two medium and then one hard.

I started in the back of the pack, Julie lead the first one, then Lindsay, then Barresi and I took the lead on the last one of the set. On my first lead I took it pretty easy, hit a 52-53, was more worried about being the jackass for blasting out a fast one than I was about being a little slow. Second set when pretty smoothly too, everything was between 54-50 until the last one. I checked with everyone before I took the last one that it was supposed to be a little harder than the rest of the set. I opened up my stride a little bit more on the last one but kept it under control and ran one of my smoother 45's. I think it might have caught Julie off guard a little bit but Lindsay seemed pretty happy that the last one had gotten down below 50.

It wasn't a workout to write home about, but it does give me the feeling that I'm getting fitter. Did about 6 miles a little uptempo afterwards to get about 10 on the day. Solid day...going to see if Coach will let me do some road mile soon.

In regards to whats up with Chris...honestly didn't see or hear much from him today, but I'm going to check up on, you guessed it, his computer tonight.